Good Father always in a good beeR..

lol.. hahaha.. huhuhu.. i should say.. here i go again.. hating my father for being drunk again.. he's just SO GOOD when he's drunk yet SO BAD for me.. hope you'll get what I say.. DAMN... he's just something I don't understand.. like brother.. yeah!!.. totally believe what the saying says.. LIKE FATHER LIKE SON.. damn saying but true for my father and brother.. like my brother.. my father is very generous too.. if he could only guve our house, and everything we have i think I'am homneless now.. good he doesn't reach that point.. but yeah.. GOOD intention BUT in a BAD way..

you know how people behave when they drunk mostly I mean.. Noisy!!,, the talks are goin back, over and over again.. DAMN hate it.. sometimes I just pretend Iam sleeping so he won't talk to me...

and next day.. DAMN.. he'll be so BAD, ANGRY, MAD, like he had all the problem in this world.. know why?.. His DAMN money are gone.. and he's going to blame now.. everyone at home.. but no worries I get Used to it.. (just hear what he say and let it out in the other ear..)

best brother in the whole world..

aaww.. G!! thanks that you didn't hve my brother.. well first let me tell you his good qualities first.. yeah.. he's a good brother, caring I can say, very kind, very generous, and very patient..

here comes the not so good traits of his.. he always drink like there's no tomorrow, and if he's drunk he is so generous to evryone as if he has everything.. the fucking part is that.. he thinks, everything in this world is he's.. like he's providing evrything for evryone.. you know what I mean?..

and offcourse well his loving girlfriend is here again... I wonder what kind of family the girl has.. what kind of parents does she has..(sorry fo telling this, just being true...) how could her parents let her sleep to our house??.. tell me?.. Do they still have values?.. or have they even learned values..

it's not that I don't like the girl.. it's just that, I just don't see what's their point.. to show everyone that they are inlove.. to prove everyone that they are.. u know..

and why can't they just wait??..

and just because my brother has job he can do evrything he wants.. w/o thinking what my parents might think.. damn!!!!!!! bullshit!!..


and 1 more thing well thanks to my father and mother for understanding my big but crap mind brother!!.... I can't even imagine what's on my mother and father's mind for letting the girl stay in our home!!..

I just want to let out evrything in me..

friendly thought..

sometimes the one's you considered as friend does not really deserved to be call one..
you have been good all the time, did everything to be nice and most of all trust them..

but sometimes the enemy you considered before.. out of nowhere will somehow treat you as good as they can.. will even fight for you..

I have experienced this with my friend.. for all those years I have trust her, I have been good, I've been nice.. and yet just to know she's a fucking shit!!!!.. she doesn't deserve me...

:(

I have to find myself.. I'm totally lost.. totally mess up right now.. i just want to be somewhere no one knows me and no one cares for me.. somewhere i could find myself enjoying my life..

can anyone tell me where that place could be?..

a day in my life..

another day has come still nothing has changed, still hoping to be somewhere out of here, I can't help it thinking going out of here.. i don't enjoy my life anymore, i need a new life.. to start over again.. i wish I had amnesia so i won't remember anything, anyone or even who am I... awww...

A piece of Myself..

christmas day..

CHRISTMAS DAy

aw.... I thank GOD for everything:).. Wished that I enjoyed.. I can't stop not being sad.. It's just that i miss my BESTFRIEND.. :(( I really do miss her.. I don't know till when will I be like this.. It sucksss..

to all the people who are visiting this blog:)

whatever is posted here is my own opinion, thoughts, and etc. nothing personal:) don't get mad at me.. thanks:)